|| -------- -- -----  A E R I E   O B L I V I A N A . singular book of text wandertainment by Frank Edward Nora ------------------- ----------- THE DARK OF COLLEGE--CUP 4--"MALL IN A CANDLE" <-------  ||  Severe Repair  ||  The Dark of College  ||  -------> (Cup SRdc004, Created v2 (6/7/99), Copyright 1999) = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = Teenagers. "A mall is a place, see?" said Couch Vartoon. "A place with girls and other stuff like stores." Skinny, nerdy, glasses, trying to be cool. "Fiasco Mills Mall. Sounds like that could describe it perfectly," said Yark Fathgocken. Chubby, straight blond hair, innocent. Couch was driving his uncle's hovercraft. Yark wasn't sure if the uncle knew they were using it. They were driving down a dirt road through a forest. There was stark sunlight and silence beyond the whir of the hovercraft. "Look man, I got all this money," Couch said with a crooked smile. "Burning a hole in my pockets. Let's use it to get some different kind of holes!" "Man, you're crazy. I'm not gonna just go... go to, y'know... to hookers..." "What? What are you talking about? You don't pay for love when you can get it for free! Come on Fathgocken!" Yark paused and looked serious as he said, "So what do we need the money for, then?" "To impress the girls!" "I thought you said it was free." "It IS free, but no girl is gonna look twice at us if we go in there like a couple of losers with no money to spend!" Suddenly, there was a bolt of electricity arcing from the hood of the hovercraft into the woods. It made a loud zapping noise, and the hovercraft spun out of control. Couch struggled to maintain control, but the hovercraft smashed right into a big tree. The vehicle fell to the ground, and then all was silent. The two guys sat in stunned silence. Neither was hurt. "Man," Yark said, "man, your uncle is gonna kill us." Couch snickered a little. "What! What's so funny!" "I was gonna ask him," Couch said,. "I really was. But he was out at the ocean hazeworld, and I couldn't get through to him. I needed to borrow the hovercraft, but the keys weren't where he usually left them. So I hotwired the thing. Now he'll never know it was us! We can just pretend someone else stole it!" "Oh come on. You know lies like that always come out in the end. He'll find your fingerprints in here or something. It's better just to face up to it. I mean, it was an accident. Wasn't it? What was that lightning anyway?" Then they saw someone approaching. He was a tall fellow, with a mustache and beard, smiling, holding a big hunk of metal or machinery or something. "You guys all right?" he yelled out. "C'mon, get out." Couch said. Yark managed to get his door open and get out, but Couch's door was jammed shut, so he had to crawl over and get out the passenger door. "You guys okay? I'm sorry about that," the guy said, looking back and forth at Couch and Yark. "I was just calibrating the security system when you guys drove by. Awful sorry. But it is private property, you know." "I told you!" Yark said with a pained look. "I told you I saw those signs!" "I know! But I thought it was the same shortcut to the mall I took before!" Couch said through clenched teeth. "Mall?" the guy asked. "What mall?" "Fiasco Mills." Couch said. The guy shook his head. "You're nowhere near there. This is the entirely opposite direction, if you were coming from Hulpabarny, as I assume." "Yeah." Yark said. "Well again, I have to say I'm sorry. I was planning on putting up more signs and a fence a little later. Guess I was over-anxious to get the Bolt Archer up and running. Guess it works! That was a joke, boys." The two just stared at the guy. "You can come and use my phone. Least I can do. Is it, is the hovercraft, does it belong to one of you?" "His uncle." Yark said, motioning to Couch with his thumb. Couch shoved Yark in the arm. "Shut up man!" The guy clapped his hands. "Well. That's it then. Come on in and you can call your uncle. The damage does not look totally irreparable." He turned and began walking down the road. Couch and Yark followed him. "I had a shopping mall in a candle," the guy said, still walking, turning to look at the boys. "Uh-huh." Yark said absently. Couch nodded, but then frowned. "Um..." Couch said, "what was that? A candle?" "Yeah," the guy said, looking forward again. "I had a mall in a candle. One of those glass jar type of candles, burns for a long time. Green wax. And as it burns, you get maybe a half-inch of liquid wax in there. And I started noticing these little guys walking around in there. They seemed to be having an awfully good time. Yeah, and once, they built this whole kind of shopping mall for their friends. It was pretty cool. I feel kinda bad when I have to blow the candle out. They know to get out when the gettin's good, though. To wherever it is they go." The two boys' eyes widened as they heard this, but they kept on following the guy. "What did you read that in a comic book or something?" Yark asked. "No siree," the guy said, "it's real. I know it sounds kinda funny, but I guarantee it. I could even show you, they've been coming pretty regularly." Couch stared over at Yark with a questioning gaze, but Yark just shrugged helplessly. -------> ------------------- ----------- -------- -- -----