|| -------- -- -----  A E R I E   O B L I V I A N A . singular book of text wandertainment by Frank Edward Nora ------------------- ----------- A ROAD MAP OF ARCTICA--CUP 23--"A MUSICAL MISSION" <-------  ||  Severe Repair  ||  A Road Map of Arctica  ||  -------> (Cup SRrm023, Created v2 (6/7/99), Copyright 1999) = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = ***A MUSICAL MISSION*** You know, I never really did get the hang of CD's. It's a tactile thing, really. Touch. I mean, with vinyl, you could maybe even partially clip a fingernail and set it in a groove and get some sort of sound. It's analog. You can see it, you can touch it. I know with me being so into computers it must seem strange that I've been hanging onto this outdated tech, but hey, that's why I'm Comma and you're not! Also, I guess, there's the matter of principle that I don't want to make the record companies richer by buying CD versions of LP's that I've already bought. But I've been running into problems in the general subject of borrowing music from friends, because just about all my friends have switched over to CD. Enter MiniDisk. This amazing new technology from Sony allows you to record on a somewhat-CD-like disk, giving you the advantages of CD's (ostensibly better sound quality, easy random access, and no degradation of sound quality with repeated listening). So, I have decided to get a MiniDisk player/recorder, and transfer my entire record collection to MiniDisk. One thing I love about this idea is that all the pops and hisses that occur when I play each record and record it will then be preserved forevermore in pristine digital clarity. I think there's something just so cool about that. So screw all you record companies. And screw CD's! Starting soon, I will listen EXCLUSIVELY to MiniDisks of my records, and NOTHING ELSE! Now all I gotta do is scrape up many hundreds of dollars to buy the damn machine... ***RANDOM THOUGHTS OF FINENESS*** Y'know, I'm really confused by Playboy Magazine. No, no, it's not that I don't know what I'm looking at--I'm not THAT naive--it's just that I find myself forming emotional ties with the various lovely centerfolds each month, and I'm quite perturbed by it. Love, infatuation, lust--call it what you will--but I get these reactions, to what is, really, a bunch of little colored dots on a gloss-coated sheet of dead tree matter. What the heck is wrong with me? The brain is a marvelous thing, but when it goes way overboard like this--getting you emotionally attached to images on paper--then there's something wrong. It's wrong I tell you. WRONG! WRONGO!!!! Ahem. Excuse me. Got a little carried away there. Let me move onto another of my favorite topics--how people love to annoy me so. Lately, I've been drinking ginger ale from a coffee mug. I don't know, call me crazy, but it seems that a coffee mug is eminently utile as a container for any kind of liquid. So why do people give me such grief when they see me sipping that golden pop nectar, that GINGER ALE, from a coffee mug? Wake up, people! There's a whole world out there if you just open your darn EYES!!!! Wow. I'm really shot out of a cannon today. Up on a soapbox, running my mouth off, whatever. Yup. Farewell, children! ***THE MANIC MISADVENTURES OF FNUD*** FNUD--"Wow. I've really picked up speed over the desert. Wait, what's this? Conical dwellings of some sort?" Fnud slows as he flies into an American Indian village. YOUNG INDIAN--"Get outta here, ball-that's-not-doing-what-it's-supposed-to-be-doing!" FNUD--"Wow, hey, think I can wear a feather on my head too, like you?" YOUNG INDIAN--"I could attach it to you in a manner similar to the way we attach points to arrows." FNUD--"Um, what method might that be, good fellow?" YOUNG INDIAN--"We use antelope tendons." FNUD--"Wow, hey, maybe a feather's not such a bright idea after all. Might slow me down. Bye bye, there!" FNUD picks up speed and zooms off across the desert... ***PARTING SHOT OF THE LIGHTNING KIND*** Well, that's about it for this month. 1994 will be here soon, and the Comma Empire will soon rule! Hey baby, you can say you read my stuff before I became an international superstar! Keep those letters comin'! Hey man, what's this crazy L on MY HEAD! (Look at a keyboard to see why this is funny). Ta ta! , ***END THIS COMMA'S COMA*** -------> ------------------- ----------- -------- -- -----